Ancestry: Danish, Swedish, Bohemian
Occupation: Business Analyst
Hobbies: Writing, Woodwork, Sports
Ancestry: Polish, Irish
Hobbies: Reading, Sewing, Swimming
Dear Expectant Mom
“When my kids were born, I made two prayers. One, that they would be healthy. Two, that they would be happy.” Chelsie’s father spoke these words to us at our wedding. They are the same prayers we have for our future child. Your journey to this point, to reading this letter, we imagine has had its ups and downs. We are grateful that you are reflecting on your future and what you want for your child. We can’t pretend to know exactly what our future holds. We can’t make promises about the exact path your child’s life will take if they join our family. However, we can promise they will be loved unconditionally and given every opportunity to be exactly who they are. We can promise not only to love your child, but to protect, nurture, educate, encourage, and provide for him or her as well.
We have been navigating life together since we met working at a summer camp for people with disabilities in 2010. Working so closely together (you are “on duty” 22 hours a day at camp) allowed us to quickly learn the strengths and weaknesses of the other and how to support her through both the good and challenging times. Together we’ve navigated coming out to our families, first full-time jobs, puppy training (twice), home buying, and marriage. Our lives are full of love. We have surrounded ourselves with a strong community of family and friends. We would love to share this life we have built with your child.
We look forward to introducing your child to our current traditions and creating new ones as they grow up. During the summer, we compete in the family mini golf classic. We are currently the 3rd generation of competitors and are excited to see a fourth generation join in and win trophies. In October each year, we gather with over fifty of Chelsie’s extended family members, including the ever-growing number of children, to celebrate the annual “All-a-Day,” where we spend all day celebrating the year’s holidays (think pumpkin carving, a Fourth of July parade, Thanksgiving dinner, and a Christmas gift exchange). Palm Sunday weekend, we gather with Kat’s extended family for a few rounds of bowling before sitting down to share a meal. Although we have many extended family traditions, we are excited to create our own smaller traditions with your child, like making pancakes on Saturday mornings and receiving new pajamas on Christmas Eve before we snuggle up to read a new book.
During the summer, we enjoy riding our bikes around the local lakes, kayaking, and going on walks with our dogs. In the Minnesota winters, we spend more time in front of our fireplace reading and watching movies. Your child will learn an active lifestyle, how to slow down and be in the moment, a love for the outdoors, and a sense of purpose while being surrounded by family and friends that love them.
Neither of us traveled far until school trips in middle school and high school. Our vacations rarely extended outside of the Midwest. We are now lucky enough to have the means to enjoy extended vacations each year to Hawaii, Florida, or anywhere we think we would enjoy exploring. Our vacations are filled with conversations of all the things we will do when we return someday with our future child. We plan to provide your child with the opportunity to see the country and the world. We truly look forward to people not looking at us strangely when we say we are going on vacation to Disney World without children :).
If you choose us as family for your child, we look forward not only to welcoming him or her into our lives, but you as well, in whatever form you are comfortable with. It is important that your child knows where he or she came from and that they joined us out of love. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to share more about ourselves. We wish you luck in your decision and if you choose to parent, congratulations! We couldn’t be happier for you.
Kat & Chelsie
Q & A
Q: When you have a 3-day weekend, what you like to do?
A: We like to use 3-day weekends to visit Kat’s family in Wisconsin since the drive is 4.5 hours. Sometime we have activities planned with them, but often it involves hanging out with Kat’s nephews who live right next door to Kat’s parents. Currently that includes playing with Thomas trains, biking to the park, and reading books.
Q: Do you have pets? If so, tell us about them.
A: We have 2 dogs, Flint and Kara. Flint joined our family as a puppy in fall 2011 when we picked him out at the local Humane Society. Kat had been begging Chelsie to get a dog the moment they moved into a rental that would allow animals. He is a brown lab mix and thinks he is a lap dog. He enjoys chewing on antlers and wood and sleeping on Kat’s pillow when she gets out of bed. Flint is very loyal and wants to be wherever we are (translation, we never worry that he will run away)! Kara joined our family, also as a puppy, in the fall of 2017 from a local rescue. She is energetic and talkative. Her liveliness makes Flint act young again too! She hasn’t figured out that dogs barking on the TV are not neighborhood dogs that she likes to bark at. Her favorite thing to do is chew – on anything, but mostly the chew toys we give her. She also likes to make weird dinosaur-like sounds when she wants attention.
Q: What do you hope to teach your child(ren)?
A: We hope to teach our children compassion, kindness, and acceptance of all people. We wish for them to be authentically and proudly themselves while still having an open mind and heart to others’ views and ideas. While Chelsie looks forward to teaching your children how to play basketball and Kat her love of theater, even more, we can’t wait for our children to discover their own interests and to encourage and cheer them on in whatever they enjoy doing.
Q: What will you tell your child about his or her birthmom?
A: Right now, all we know about our future child’s birthmother is that she will be one of the most important people who will ever be part of our lives and our child will certainly know and be reminded of this. We look forward to telling our child all about their adoption story and plan on making it part of our bedtime routine. We want our child to know where they came from and understand all of the love that went into their birth and adoption. We will try to answer any questions he or she has honestly. We are optimistic that we will continue to have some relationship with their birth mom and will be able those questions.
Q: Are you active in your church? Tell us about your activities.
A: We are not currently active in our church but our Christian faith has been an important part of making both of who we are. We were both very active in our college faith communities, Kat working as the Social Justice coordinator for her church and Chelsie serving as leadership in a weekly worship group on her campus. Although we haven’t found the perfect place for us to worship as a family now, we plan to encourage our child to learn and explore what Christianity means to them as they grow.
Q: Describe your last vacation and/or daytrip.
A: Our last vacation was a 6-day trip to Disney World. It was the second time we have gone together and we felt like we had a better understanding of how not to be overwhelmed in the parks. We loved the magic of the Frozen sing-a-long when all of the children, after belting all of the words to each song, are in awe as “snow” falls on them at the end. We went on 2 safari rides and learned all that Disney is doing to help conserve and protect animals around the world. We especially loved the African wild dogs that look almost identical to our dog, Kara. We loved taking pictures with all of the Disney characters, especially Mickey and Donald to show our nephew, who is obsessed, when we got home. Though we had a great time, we spent quite a bit of it thinking about who great it will be when we are able to take our future child and see the magic through their eyes. We currently have a Pluto plush waiting to be loved by him or her.
Q: Will you be a stay-at-home parent? If so, what are your day-to-day plans?
A: We are both planning on taking maternity leave to bond with our child. After maternity leave is complete, Chelsie’s parents will provide weekday care. Both of Chelsie’s parents are excited to be first time grandparents and can’t wait to take your child with them on visits to the local nursing home and out to the family property (“the forty”) where Chelsie’s dad maintains a large garden. When your child is a little older we plan to enroll them in a day care or preschool program so they socialize with other kids their age.
Q: When you close your eyes and see yourself holding your precious baby in your arms, what are your thoughts regarding his or her Birth Mother?
A: We will forever be grateful for the gift of her child. We are inspired by her love of life and her self-sacrifice to give her child something that she is not necessarily able to provide. We also imagine some of the pain she may be feeling over the loss. We hope that while we hold our baby in our arms that we know his or her birth mom is still a part of their story and will be around in the future as part of our extended family.
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